Monday, December 22, 2008
A lot of people get really 'jazzed' up for the holiday season. I am definitely NOT one of them.
I see Christmas decorations as 'clutter' - not just in my house, but in my brain.
I see the holidays as a colossal waste of money, time and effort.
Christmas does not bring out the best in people. Am I just jaded? I swear people get nastier this time of year. I don't know if it's the pressure or just the fact that there are more of them out there.
I was at Toys R Us yesterday and you would have thought I was in a war zone. People were fighting over the dumbest things. There was junk EVERYWHERE. I even found something that Allison had asked for from Santa - naturally it was the ONLY one, but it had been battered and bruised and there were pieces missing. I brought it to the front to see if I could get a discount and was number one, DENIED (I guess they can return items for a refund) and number two, TRAMPLED by families with kids in tow. They were vicious about getting to the front of the lines, kids were screaming, I couldn't speak to the manager because she was cleaning up vomit in aisle four and there was a communication barrier between most of the employees and the customers. Fun, fun, fun.
My main goal right now is to not let my kids sense it or think my stress has anything to do with them.
Every morning the kids get up to search for 'Christopher', the elf on a shelf. For those of you who haven't heard of it, the elf is essentially a spy for Santa and every night it hides in a new place in the house for the kids to find. Christopher is the name that they picked out for him. Christopher has been pretty darn creative with his hiding spots (depending on how much wine he's consumed, I'm assuming). Currently he is residing in a flower vase, with a candy cane, on top of the 'fridge. Yesterday he was ensconced in a plant, tomorrow, who knows... The kids get so excited to try and find him every day. They are hysterical.
Right now they are watching 'Iron Man' - which I know is wholly inappropriate - but Daddy promised that they could see it. Yeah, Daddy. Of course, they are not that 'into' it, as they also have bubble wrap to pop - oh what fun. Yet another reason that Mama wants to get her drink on so early in the morning.
Daddy is currently working on a roof down at NASA installing some sort of antenna thing. Naturally the high temp today is going to be 32 with sleet and a wind chill in the 20's. Sweet! He's LOVING life! Tomorrow the temp is supposed to be in the 70's - Houston... gotta love it.
The saving grace for my kids right now is that they have my mom here. They just LOVE their Meme. I swear, she's like the baby whisperer. When she puts the kids to bed they actually sleep! I'm NOT going to let her leave in the Spring.....
Iron Man just ended and Danny was rocking out to 'Iron Man' by Black Sabbath - there was head banging involved and everything.... too funny - Daddy's boy. Party's over, back to work
As my mom would say, 'Merry F&##( Christmas'
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Rick has been working in an alternate universe doing manual labor in Newark (yup, that's Jersey, folks). He's been working installing antennas (antennae?) on top of Continental airlines' terminal to help expedite baggage handling for you and me (the collective 'we') - do you like how I'm embracing change or what???? The only problem is that the poor guy hasn't done manual labor since the day I met him - circa 1993 - and he CERTAINLY hasn't had to do manual labor in conditions where it's "Windy with rain and snow showers. Highs in the low 40s and lows in the upper 20s." - Odds are 2 to 1 that he comes home with a raging case of pneumonia.
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
As it gets closer to Christmas - (the season apparently starts in August these days) more and more commercials are on with things that the kids just HAVE to have.
Naturally it's every piece of crap imaginable. From Pixos (google it, it's stupid) to some kind of 'easy bake oven wannabe' to Power Ranger weapons to My Little Pony to RC cars and 'Swim To Me Puppy' (that's really dumb).
I think Allison actually saw a harp in a catalog and said that she wanted THAT too. !!?!?!!?
Every time they say they want something I tell them to write it down to ask Santa. I figure if they can get motivated enough to write down something they want, they must really want it. The other stuff is just fluff that's being shoved in their face by the ad agencies.
Needless to say, they've YET to actually write anything down. Too much effort to find a writing utensil apparently.
Well, the Army Corp came out today. Poor kid looked like he was about 21 - said this was his first assessment. He had just flown in from Honolulu. He noticed my Red Sox sweatshirt (yes, I'm all bundled up today, it's in the 60's) and we proceeded to chit chat for 20 minutes about the joy of Big Papi and what a jerk Johnny Damon is and how he belongs in NYC.
He had gone to MIT and was volunteering here because he had seen so much on TV about the damage.
To be truthful, I was kind of embarrassed that I didn't have more damage like a sailboat in my laundry room or something cool. I told him to go and use the resources somewhere else. I could live with my buckets in the living room for a little while longer. Hell, we're not even going to meet our deductible. I told him to go and help out someone with an entire tree in their kitchen.
Let's all pray for clear weather until my contractor can make it back.....
Took Allison to the doctor on Tuesday. Poor thing not only has mono, but 2 ear infections and a sinus infection to boot! Lucky girl! No wonder she's been so miserable! Who could blame her?
I got a phone call from one of the parents of a kid in her class. Apparently my idea of nutrition has caused an uproar in the classroom. When did pop tarts become public enemy number one? So I didn't get to the grocery store over the weekend. So what if she had Ding Dongs, Pop Tarts, a juice box, Frito's, Twizzlers and a somewhat iffy apple. At least I tried. I explained to the other Mom that by child #2, your ideals become a little less 'strict', shall we say.
Heck, I'm just happy that I haven't killed that child yet. We're doing A OK!
*Note to Mom, I took my meds today* :-) (while giving a thumbs up)
Monday, October 20, 2008
It's just not fair.
Now that I can stay up as late as I want.... I'm tired and I want to go to bed.
Now that I can eat ice cream for dinner.... I don't want to gain weight.
Now that I don't have to clean my room... I'm embarrassed if I don't.
Now that I can watch R rated movies.... they bore me.
What the hell?
I went grocery shopping tonight and finished up just as it was getting dark. 'Gimme Shelter' by the Rolling Stones came on the radio as I was driving home and I was thinking... "I should really hurry up - nothing good ever happens after dark". Good Lord. Who Am I?
Is this the same person that used to drink a 12 pack daily? At a bar? Where everyone knew my name? And they certainly didn't expect me to leave before closing time!
We used to work from 5 am until 8 pm go out drinking until 1 - 1:30 am and get up and do it all again. DAILY.
I've ridden on motorcycles at 100 mph. I've gotten a tattoo. I've gone to NYC by myself. I moved to Texas from NH with $100 in my pocket. I've hitchhiked. I've lived in my car. I've been on road trips to foreign countries and stayed with people we didn't know. I've been in the 'kill zone' of a SWAT team. I've been in the back of a cruiser (more than once).
True, all of these things make me borderline stupid... but.... why am I so squirrelly now?
Hurry up and get home before dark? What in the hell is that? Is it getting old? Or is it being a Mom?
Is it wanting to be here to protect them or to be here to catch them doing all of the things that YOU did?
BTW - The Patriots are trying their damnedest to make up for the Red Sox loss last night and keep all of New England out of a deep dark depression. Thank you Pats.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Yup.... That's a tube top that says... "Delicious"
Straight out of Walmart. Does it get any better than that?
Wait... Yes, yes it does get better than that.... case and point....
Have you ever seen so much electric blue eyeshadow in this decade in YOUR LIFE?????
Granted, it was for a 'white trash' party - but unfortunately we found our costumes straight out of our own closets. *sigh* The same crowd has a Halloween party coming up. Can't wait to see what a debacle THAT turns out to be. Thankfully, we've all found our calling in life, and public office doesn't seem to be a part of any of it!
Update on the roof leak. Last night I was coming downstairs from reading to the kids and was bipped in the head by a drip of water... mind you it was raining.... but the stairs are covered by the attic.... uh oh... apparently our a/c condenser has decided that it wants a piece of the action as well. So here we go with ceiling wet spot #5 - pretty awesome, huh? Love it!
Still waiting on the general contractor to make an appointment to come out to see us -
still waiting on the a/c guys to call back to make an appointment to come out to see us -
still waiting for my meds to kick in...
still waiting for the kids to go to bed.
Still waiting to win the lotto.
Yada, yada, yada. and so it goes...
at least I'm not running for office!
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Ugh... Yup... You guessed it. We just got rain for the first time since Ike made his guest appearance in South East Texas.
Al came running in.... 'MAMA... MAMA! Dere is WATAH comin in da HOUSE!!!!'
Naturally it couldn't just come through the ceiling... no. no. no. too easy... the light fixture is the only way to go! So now it looks like I've got to get a roofer, a sheetrocker, a pattern guy, because of course my ceiling has some sort of stupid texture on it, a painter AND an electrician (where's Skyline Electric when I need it?) (that's a private joke for YOU, Mom :-)
Here's the kicker.... I'm not sure what our deductible is. We have two different ones. One for Windstorm and Hail ($2350) and once for Tropical Cyclone ($4700) - Of course you know which one the insurance company is going to call it!!!!! Ugh.
The reason I wished that it had rained on Friday is because we went and 'donated' all of our money to the Coushatta tribe over the weekend. For those of you in New England, you can relate it to donating to the Foxwoods or Mohegan Sun complexes. :-(
To celebrate our ten year anniversary, Rick and I got the bright idea that it would be fun to go and steal some money from the tribe and run back home... yeah, right.... they took our money, comp'ed us a $15 breakfast and called it a weekend. We had a good time though, it was nice to get away and have some grown-up time. The in-laws had a great time spoiling the hell out of the kids and unfortunately for ALL of us, reality has set in.
Mom just got home from her trip abroad. I asked her what her very favorite thing that she saw was. (Mind you, she went to Barcelona and all over Italy).
She says.... 'the mosaics in Pompeii.'
I said, 'really? were they breathtaking?'
she said, 'oh there were all types of penises'
Yup.... no lie.... even before discussing the Vatican.... Penises in Pompeii... God Bless her.....
Okay, enough fun... gotta do research to see what the hell I need to do to get FEMA out here and get some food stamps or something. Your government dollars at work! Wee hoo!
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
I'm posting this in honor of our ten year wedding anniversary... here's to you, honey! :-) xoxoxo
Three women friends, one in a casual relationship, one engaged to be married and one a long-time wife, met for drinks after work.
The conversation eventually drifted towards how best to spice up their sex lives. After much discussion, they decided to surprise their men by engaging in some S&M role playing.
The following week they met up again to compare notes.
Sipping her drink, the single girl leered and said, 'Last Friday at the end of the work day I went to my boyfriend's office wearing a leather coat. When all the other people had left, I slipped out of it and all I had on was a leather bodice, black stockings and stiletto heels. He was so aroused that we made mad passionate love on his desk right then and there!'
The engaged woman giggled and said, 'That's pretty much my story! When my fiancé got home last Friday, he found me waiting for him in a black mask, leather bodice, black hose and stiletto pumps. He was so turned on that we not only made love all night, he wants to move up our wedding date!
The married woman put her glass down and said, 'I did a lot of planning. I made arrangements for the kids to stay over at Grandma's. I took a long, scented-oil bath and then put on my best perfume. I slipped into a tight leather bodice, a black garter belt, black stockings and six-inch stilettos. I finished it off with a black mask, ready for action.
When my husband got home from work, he grabbed a beer and the remote, sat down and yelled
'Hey, Batman, what's for dinner?'
*the irony is that I got this joke from my friend, Robyn*
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
And again, here's my ADD showing, but... Here's our Halloweens through the ages.... enjoy! :-)
Friday, October 3, 2008
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Danny boy had his picture day at school today. Poor guy. He put on a golf shirt, looked cool, and then proceeded to button it up all the way. All he needed was a little pocket protector and he would have been good to go. Have any of you ever seen that commercial with the three little boys doing the robot dance? That's my Danny.
In the meantime, I'm partially dreading this weekend. It's going to be a little too jam-packed for my liking. Friday, Rick has band practice. Saturday, Rick has band practice and auditions for a new guitarist. Saturday night we have a birthday party to go to - it's a Wii party for a 5 year old. Hopefully there will be beer.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
You know those days... the hostility just bubbles up out of you and affects (effects?) everyone around you. People at the grocery store shy away from you. Pets cower. Flowers wilt when you pass by. Even if you don't know what I'm talking about, just humor me and pretend I'm not the only one who has 'angry' days.
There are days that you just wake up in the morning scowling.. even before your feet hit the floor you think, 'ugh' and hope that the feeling will pass. As a general rule usually some candy corn is sufficient to get me out of my mood, but occasionally it turns to 'when was the last time I took my meds?' My mom and my husband are usually the first ones to ask if it's been a while since i remembered to take my pill. It's kind of scary that people can know you so well.
Today I woke up and sat up in bed growling. It's not the meds, it's just one of those days that you would rather stay under the covers. Unfortunately with two small kids that's just not a option. As I prepared for the worst and stomped in to wake up the kids for school, I opened my bedroom door and was immediately hit by a smell permeating the house.
My husband made me coffee.
He didn't have to make me coffee. He just did it. I didn't ask him to do it. I didn't even hint at wanting him to do it. He just did it out of the kindness of his heart before he left for work. He doesn't drink coffee. He didn't do it for himself. He just did it to be sweet.
How can you be angry when someone is thinking of ways to be kind to you?
Makes you want to "Pay it forward" doesn't it? Do something kind today. Even if the person doesn't tell you, it's appreciated at so many levels.
And now for your entertainment....
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Just when you think you've got them figured out... they go and make up their own minds on you!
Well, tomorrow is Monday - and thank heaven for that. Allison had a little too much ice cream today... well... a LOT too much ice cream today. She went with me to WalMart and I bought her a chocolate shake (so she'd ride in the cart) - Bribery is a necessity in some situations. Trust me. Once we got home, the kids heard the ice cream truck and of course Daddy is the ultimate sucker for the ice cream man, so.... well.... you can guess the rest. The good thing is that I was forced to steam clean the carpets upstairs and wash out all of Danny's HotWheels & Matchbox cars. (A job I could have happily put off for another 4 years). All that being said... she's STILL going to school tomorrow. She was fine tonight (more than fine, she was downright feisty!) with no fever - just an upset tummy from too much of the good stuff. Does that make me a bad parent that I'm so willing (and looking forward to) sending her on in to school?
Saturday, September 27, 2008
And the kids being kids - that's the best thing of all...such individuals they are!!! For the most part, it's a fun ride
Thursday, September 25, 2008
as many of you know, poor Miss Allison has been diagnosed with mono and has been feeling pretty crummy for about a month. Unfortunately, the doc said that it could continue for up to THREE months. Earlier today she was just WICKED.. we had to abort a trip to Target and suffer through several time-outs in order to maintain everyone's sanity. She's been clearing her throat a lot so I asked her if she had a sore throat.. she said, 'yes, but that's not the problem, mama... my head hurts so very very badly' (again with the drama) -
The good news is that after lunch I gave her some children's Tylenol and now she's a different person! (Yup, get that Mom-of-the-Year trophy out for me - for telling my child to 'suck it up' when she apparently really IS sick)
Well, since she was able to pull it together I told her she could have a friend over to play. She chose Lilly Bean. Bean is the youngest of my friend Kellie's kids - She just turned three in August (and yes, that is her older sister that just turned 16 yesterday) - God bless Kellie - she has FOUR daughters - nope, no typo - FOUR !!! I can't even handle ONE for Pete's sake.. that's on top of the two dogs, one cat, one fish and two guinea pigs - wanna talk about someone who thrives in mayhem?!?!?!
Anyways... this is about Al and Bean - they initially decided to have a tea party, but when mama said NO to the real food option, they went for option two and asked for music.. I told them that they had to be in charge of their own play list... I've been listening from downstairs and this is what they've managed so far. (from a song list of thousands)
James Brown 'I feel good'
KC & the Sunshine Band 'I'm your Boogie Man'
Outkast - 'Hey ya'
Patti LaBelle - 'Lady Marmalade'
Ray Charles - 'What'd I Say'
They've been quite the dancing queens up there - I finally went up to get a quick picture and the video is just priceless - Bean is getting down to business by taking off her jacket and Allison has her princess dress on, hand on her hip and her Buzz Lightyear cell phone attached to her ear! Too funny! Enjoy!
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
For my kids, they are completely enamoured with the Star Wars series. Originals, cartoons, sequels, prequels, video games, toys, anything.... they can endlessly watch any of the versions for a good 15 hours straight. (15 hours is when their little brains implode - we've tested it)
My husband however, is another matter... that man can watch the following movies at LEAST 150 times in a row and still not be sick of them...
'Big Trouble in Little China'
'Raiders of the Lost Ark'
'Star Wars' * 1-6
'Close Encounters of the 3rd Kind'
'Dances with Wolves'
'The Towering Inferno'
'Die Hard' * all of them
'Hunt for Red October'
'Bourne Identity' *all of them
'The Matrix' *all of them
Mind you, this is on top of SportsCenter, (which i believe is shown every 7 minutes or so it seems)
and finally... there's football season.
How is it possible to remember every stat about every player every year since the inception of the game? (but he STILL has no idea what color eyes I have)
*in his defense, he IS colorblind*
Is it just a comfort thing or are they just hypnotized.
Monday, September 22, 2008
I just assume that things are as easy for my kids as they are for me....
Like tonight for example, Danny asked me to show him how to tie his shoes.
It never occurred to me to teach him... after all that's what Velcro is for, right?
He soaked that info up just like he was a little sponge... brain ticking.... hands working.... frustration setting in.... and then all of a sudden... Voilà!
That moment of complete success and pride.
Check out the video...
(if you click on the picture it will enlarge so you can see the detail of the lovely purple eyeshadow and glitter "lipstick")
~this is what happens when Mama makes the mistake of putting in a load of laundry while leaving the children unsupervised~
now may i present Exhibit B
How does she know how to do this when she's only 2 years old? it's not like mama parades around in HER tiara and chandelier earrings.....